"You will know the truth, and the truth will set you free"
- John 8:32
You know the days when something happens and all you wanna do is run and hide in a closet and if anyone asks you what happened you lie out your teeth? Well this is how I feel about my mom. Growing up mom worked at a corrections jail. She often brought it home with her. Mom never got how to hug or say I love you much. All I ever wanted was for her to notice me. But when you have a self-righteous sister and another one who is a hellion it's hard to get noticed. So I grew this mentality with mom, when I moved out I wanted to show her that I could make I could make it on my own. Well lets just say I kinda fell behind on a few things. Started supporting a roommate that in the end screwed me over and left me in debt. But I still lied to mom about what was going on.
I didn't want her to know how bad things had gotten for me. Even if I sunk my ship I'd go down with my lies. I was so scared of her. I didn't want her to see what a mess I'd made of my life, because honestly it was bad. But like all lies, they end. I had to come clean and stop avoiding her. After all she is my mother and if I can't tell her the truth and ask her to understand I'm doomed. By this point she is mad with me. For avoiding her, for not paying my bills on time but for the most part not trusting her to understand me and what I had done. If anyone knows about mistakes it's her. Don't get me wrong I'm not saying it to be mean but growing up my mom had a wild streak and did some crazy things. I'm sure your parents did too. She just missed me. And all my lies I'd made up to try to stop her from worrying about me fell to the ground.
I sat down over dinner and spilled it all to my sister and mom. Yes she was mad, yes she was hurt but most of all she was my mother. She didn't yell, say I told you so. She just tried to understand and help me find a way to dig myself out of this mess I'd made. She even went so far as to help pay some of the bills with me. I know mothers day is over but my mom really impressed me. She gave me a chance to start over, this time with help. So everyone reading this, call your mom and say hi and ask how she is doing. I know most of the time growing up we swore up and down our parents were out to get us and didn't get us at all and the world was so unfair. But that's not true. Cut them some slack, they are trying the best they can. It is not the end of the world if you don't go out to see the new Twlight movie on Friday. Sit down and have family night with them. Cause when your on your own you'll need them more than you ever have before. Like when you need to move and they have a truck or when your car payment is due and someone stole your bank card. But it's the little things I miss I miss the most.
I would wake up for school the dane would always jump on my bed and take it over. Mom would have Mush ready for me after my shower. Or like in Jr. High mom and I would color and wait for the bus. Looking back I think I just wanted to make her proud of me. But being like this wasn't the way to do it. So in the end I'm glad God had me face my mom cause if not I'd still be missing her and avoiding her trying to recover. Now I know I don't have to do it alone and that being honest about your problems is best. We all fall short sometimes. Even if your pride takes a hit. It's better to tell the truth and get help, then lie and face it alone.
Lesson learned. So if you take anything from this just know that yes we get mad at the rents but in the end they are still the people you can count on to have your back jack!
Signing off!
xoxo
I didn't want her to know how bad things had gotten for me. Even if I sunk my ship I'd go down with my lies. I was so scared of her. I didn't want her to see what a mess I'd made of my life, because honestly it was bad. But like all lies, they end. I had to come clean and stop avoiding her. After all she is my mother and if I can't tell her the truth and ask her to understand I'm doomed. By this point she is mad with me. For avoiding her, for not paying my bills on time but for the most part not trusting her to understand me and what I had done. If anyone knows about mistakes it's her. Don't get me wrong I'm not saying it to be mean but growing up my mom had a wild streak and did some crazy things. I'm sure your parents did too. She just missed me. And all my lies I'd made up to try to stop her from worrying about me fell to the ground.
I sat down over dinner and spilled it all to my sister and mom. Yes she was mad, yes she was hurt but most of all she was my mother. She didn't yell, say I told you so. She just tried to understand and help me find a way to dig myself out of this mess I'd made. She even went so far as to help pay some of the bills with me. I know mothers day is over but my mom really impressed me. She gave me a chance to start over, this time with help. So everyone reading this, call your mom and say hi and ask how she is doing. I know most of the time growing up we swore up and down our parents were out to get us and didn't get us at all and the world was so unfair. But that's not true. Cut them some slack, they are trying the best they can. It is not the end of the world if you don't go out to see the new Twlight movie on Friday. Sit down and have family night with them. Cause when your on your own you'll need them more than you ever have before. Like when you need to move and they have a truck or when your car payment is due and someone stole your bank card. But it's the little things I miss I miss the most.
I would wake up for school the dane would always jump on my bed and take it over. Mom would have Mush ready for me after my shower. Or like in Jr. High mom and I would color and wait for the bus. Looking back I think I just wanted to make her proud of me. But being like this wasn't the way to do it. So in the end I'm glad God had me face my mom cause if not I'd still be missing her and avoiding her trying to recover. Now I know I don't have to do it alone and that being honest about your problems is best. We all fall short sometimes. Even if your pride takes a hit. It's better to tell the truth and get help, then lie and face it alone.
Lesson learned. So if you take anything from this just know that yes we get mad at the rents but in the end they are still the people you can count on to have your back jack!
Signing off!
xoxo
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